Before The Worst
by Snoweylily
Summary: -(BOOK 1 OF BTW SERIES)- Tony Stark. Genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist. That's what the public sees. The part that he doesn't show, is the vulnerable part, trust issues, weak, everything that he hates. When the Avengers use that against him, will he ever recover? As of now, Tony Stark, will forever be in the wrong place at the wrong time, Will he ever fight back?
1. Chapter 1

**Prologue**

_Tony Stark. Genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist. That's what the public sees._

_That's what he WANTS them to see._

_The part that he doesn't show, is the vulnerable part, trust issues, weak, everything that he hates and is ashamed of._

_When the Avengers use that against him, will he ever recover?_

_Or will he allways be known as the 'Betrayer' or the 'Enemy'?_

_As of now, Tony Stark, will forever be in the wrong place at the wrong time._

_But will he ever fight back?_

* * *

**Chapter 1**

**Starting my second book!**

**So happy :)  
**

**For first book, here the link (these two stories are NOT connected, there completely separate) **

** s/9361552/1/The-End-Where-I-Begin  
**

**And now, a brief synapsis,**

**This story is called 'Before the Worst' after my favourite Script song, it's set 100% in Tony Starks Point of View (POV) and its set a month after the Avengers movie finished. The stories basically about Tony Stark, with trust lost, betrayal, and learning to trust again.  
**

**Enjoy,**

**Rachel :)**

* * *

**-Chapter 1-**

A month has passed since the Manhattan attack, as it was now known as. A full month of picking up the pieces, of rebuilding the city, of looking for Loki. The God of Mischief had escaped only two weeks after the attack. And no one has heard of him since...

* * *

"I'm getting coffee... Starbucks... I'm going to Starbucks" I announced, standing up at turning to the two others, "want anything?" Clint shook his head silently.

At least Bruce had the manners to say "No thank you". Not that I actually cared. We were all just completely wrecked, worn out, exhausted.

This is why I was getting a coffee...from Starbucks. I could easily make one at home of course, but hey, what's the fun in that?

* * *

Half an hour later I was paying for my coffee, ignoring the curious stares of the other customers. That was the single one problem I had of being a famous inventor/engineer/avenger billionaire. People tend to take notice when you walk around the place. I quickly paid at the counter and hurried back outside, pulling up my hood. It was very lightly raining, but heavy enough so I wouldn't be looked at strangely for having the hood of my jacket up. And it helped hide my face which, unforcently, was widely known in New York. But hey, that's life for ya.

* * *

Taking a sip of my now-cold coffee, I grimaced in disgust. Jeez I hated Starbucks coffee. I decide to walk home, well, as 'Home' as the Avenger tower could be when you shared it with an assassin, an archer, a god, a scientist/hulk and a super soldier. Life around there got pretty interesting... A quick movement caught my eye and I spun around. Nothing. My mind must have been playing tricks on me... But no, another movement out of the corner of my eye. And if you can't trust your own gut instinct, what can you trust? So I turned around and waited.

* * *

A second later, a jet black cat came out of an ally, its green eyes sparking against the rapidly fading sun. "A cat" I muttered, "just a cat".

But no, there was something wrong, something... Off about this cat. So I stared at it, taking it its feline qualities. For an ally cat, it was too well fed, yet it wasn't a pet. You could tell that just by looking at it, slightly ruffled up fur, guarded expression, not coming any closer than needed. A bit like myself actually, I realised, before quickly returning my attention to the stray in front of me. But this was no ally cat. He was simply too... Perfect. Well fed, clean, good condition. Not a whisker out of place.

"If you think I'm bringing you home, you've got another think coming" I said, wondering why exactly it was staring at me with its big green eyes... Dangerous green eyes. It was only then I realised, and I dropped the coffee cup in my haste to stumble away.

"It can't be" I muttered, "Loki?"

* * *

"Indeed" the cat replied, its body shaping into the God of Lies himself. Black hair and Green eyes. Not black fur and green eyes.

"I was wondering when your figure that out" he mused, grinning to himself.

"What... W-what the hell are you doing here?" I asked, steading myself against the wall.

Loki was here... In New York... Next to me. Well this is awkward.

* * *

"What are you doing here?" The God asked back and I rolled my eyes, "I LIVE here Moran. And I asked first".

He smirked at me, suddenly finding my choice of words very amusing.

"We'll I was just seeing the sights. You know, touring" he replied, as if it as the most natural thing ever for a crazy god trying to take over the world to get on a tour bus.

"As a cat?" I asked and he shrugged, "you're doing the same thing now".

"What?" I asked confused.

"Disguises Stark, disguises" he replied, "I was disguised as a cat. You're trying to disguise yourself by hiding your appearance even though it stopped raining 20 minutes ago".It stopped raining? Looking up at the sky, I let my hood fall back. He was right. The sun was back out, just soon enough to disappear into the evening sky.

"Why are you here Loki?" I asked, looking back down at him.

"I thought I already answered that. I'm sightseeing".

"No. You're not. There's no motive to that, there's no reason behind it". He took a dangerous step towards me. A warning.

"Why do I have to have a motive?" He asked his voice velvet-like, barely a whisper.

"Because you're Loki-fucking-Laufeyson" I shouted. Thank god the steered were deserted. "Everything you do has a plan" I continued, "every single tiny little detail has been thought through completely".

"What's stopping me from 'turning over a new leaf' as ye mortals call it?" He asked, his voice threatening. I rolled my eyes at him, "yea. When hell freezes over".

He glared at me, taking another step in my direction, "you should choose you words carefully Stark, they may be your last".

"Save your breath" I told him, "we both know if you wanted to kill me you'd have done it earlier on before I had a chance to blink".

He flatted slightly, "true as that may be , it does not however prevent me from hurting you".

"Why didn't you say so in the first place?" I asked, holding out my hands, "please. Be my guest. At least I won't have to listen to you talk any more".

He glared at me threateningly before stepping forward in one swift movement and punching me in the jaw. My head snapped back with the force. Reaching up and touching my lip, annoyed to find it bleeding, I slowly turned back to him, daring him to go any further. He smirked in triumph and stepped back, "You should learn to watch that mouth of yours Stark, it could lead you into all sorts of trouble".

"Believe me, it already has" I muttered, wincing as in poked at my jaw bone. It was already starting to bruise.

"I would imagine so. Now if you don't mind. I'll be one my way". I stared at him in shock, "what? That's it? You're just going to punch me once and leave? You're not going to cause any trouble or anything?"

His starling green eyes glimmered in the fast fading light, "Trust me Stark; I've already caused more trouble than you can imagine".

* * *

Half an hour later, I was still going over his words as I reached the tower. What did he mean by 'more trouble'? It wasn't something that was going to happen, cause he said 'I've already caused'. Which meant he's already done it, already caused me a bucket load of trouble...I was still musing over the possibilities when I made it to the Avengers main floor.

"Hey did ya get t-" Clint started, walking towards me, but then he completely froze, "What the fuck happened to you?" It took me a split second they realise what he was talking about.

"Oh, this?" I asked, tapping my jaw and wincing as it sent a shooting stab of pain through to my skull.

"Jeez, what happened?" Barton asked again. Should I tell him about Loki? No, I decided, it would only worry him.

"Some guy jumped me" I lied, "ran away before I had the chance to see who it was".

"Man that looks bad. Did he take anything?" He asked and I shook my head, "I had nothing on me".

"Oh. That's all right then... Well I mean it's not alright but it's better than if h-".

"Clint" I barked, "calm down. I'm fine".

"Yea, your fine. Cause everyone's fine when they get a busted jaw and a split lip" he mumbled and sighed, heading towards my room, "I'm taking a shower. You need me, you know where I am".

And hopefully, just this once, I would wake up in my bed and realise this was all a dream.

* * *

The hot water calmed me down and it was only then I realised I was shaking violently. The God had really got to me hadn't he? Taking deep breaths I let the water run down my face, I had to calm down. Just calm down. Jeez I was messed up. "Get a grip Stark" I muttered, turning off the shower, "It was just a stupid God. That's all. Since when did you ever let Loki get to you?" Never. And that was what scared me…

10 minutes later I was aimlessly pacing my room, thinking over and over the Gods words. "Trust me Stark, I've already caused more trouble than you can imagine". What had he meant? There were no more attacks on Manhattan or on all off America for that matter. And the God was all about destruction and chaos… wasn't he? Maybe he was just trying to… No. He wasn't simply trying to scare me. That would have no motive, no reason behind it. So in his eyes, it would be Pointless. So what had he meant?

"You're going to wear a hole in that carpet if you don't stop" someone said making me jump. I spun around to face Clint standing at the door. Ok, it was just Barton… not a crazed physcopath God. Just Legolas.

"I'm thinking" I explained, half truthfully.

"Right… well, Cap's done making dinner" he said, but it was obvious that he suspected something.

Forcing myself to calm down, I faked a grin, "I'll be there in 2 minutes".

"I'll tell him you're ready in 5 then" Clint replied smirking.

"Right as always feathers".

* * *

Quickly drying off my hair with a towel, I stood in front of the mirror. I had to calm down. I was completely tensed up, and with two master assassins who were trained to notice every tiny insignificant little detail, it wouldn't go unnoticed. Deep breaths. Relax. Calm down. Putting on a fake smirk, I walked down to the kitchen. Everyone but Thor was already sitting down. Banner gave a low whistle when he saw me, "who'd you annoy to get that?".

My jaw…right…stick to the plan Stark. "Some guy hit me when I was walking back" I lied. I had to stick to the story I gave Barton.

"And the other guy?" Bruce asked again as I sat down.

I sighed, "Got away before I could properly see him".

"Well, he sure gave some punch" Natasha muttered and I glared at her, "I can fight grand myself thank you".

"Just saying" she continued, "he must have had some fist".

"Yea he did. I should know".

"GUYS" Rogers barked, putting on his official I'm-Captian-America-leader-of-the-Avengers voice as he handed out the plates, "cool it".

"Did you just say 'Cool it'?" I teased, "Awww, Capcicle's all grown up".

He smiled slightly but made no attempt to argue or even glare at me. He couldn't. He was too soft. It was hilarious.

* * *

"Hey, where's Point Break?" I asked looking around. We were all more or less finished Capcicle's wonderful meal, and the God still hadn't turned up.

"Thor?" Clint asked and I nodded.

"Asgard" Bruce explained, "Left about an hour ago. Something big came up. Had to leave".

I nodded slowly… Something big came up…

"Loki's probably been found" Natasha muttered and I immediately tensed up. No, calm down. It's just a delusional jerk who things he can rule the world. CALM. DOWN. Forcing myself to relax, I stood up, trying to be as non-conspicuous as possible. "I'm…I got to go" I muttered, bringing my plate into the kitchen before making my way to the lab. Forcently no one questioned me. Unforcently, I could feel their stares burn into my back. They knew something was up. And it was only a matter of time before they found out.

* * *

"Hey Jarvis" I muttered, locking the door firmly behind me.

"Good evening sir".

"Hey you know…um…Loki?" I asked.

"Yes sir. Loki Laufeyson. Half God, half Frost Giant. Asgardian Prince. Also known as the God of Mischief or the God of Lies" Jarvis replied and I nodded, "that's the one".

"What about him, sir?"

"…Is there any possibility you could track him?" I asked, "anyway at all?"

"Oh I think that would be rather easy Stark. I'm already here".

* * *

Jumping in shock, I turned to find Loki casually sitting on a counter in the corner of the room. "You know I'm seriously starting to think you like me or something, showing up all the time" I said calmly, sitting down at my desk.

He glared at me, "I simply like causing trouble".

"Don't we all know".

"Sir shall I inform the others?" Jarvis interrupted and Loki grinned at me, "Yes , would you care to tell the others that their worst enemy is in one of their own, trusted, team mate's lab?"

"Well when you put it like that" I said, "J, wait a while".

"Are you sure that's such a good idea Sir?" he asked and Loki smirked.

"Smart machine you got yourself there Stark, it knows a bad man when it sees one".

"Jarvis is NOT an it" I said, "Jarvis is a he".

"Oh? And please, enlighten me, what does the name 'Jarvis' stand for?" Loki asked.

"Just A Rather Very Intelligent System" I replied without missing a beat and he frowned.

"Right, so the whole He's The Man That Cant Be Moved Thing? And who's he named after?" the God asked.

My mind flashed back to the time when my father was still alive. Jarvis had been the family Butler. It was who I had named the AI after. Both were helpful. What I failed to tell anyone, was that it was Jarvis who had been driving the night my parents died. I didn't even let Pepper or Happy know. Nor did Rhodey or the team, not to mind anyone else. No one knew.

"Ah, struck a nerve did I?" Loki asked smirking, "come on Stark, tell us all about it".

"What do you want Rudolf?" I asked through gritted teeth.

"I simply want to cause trouble. To you specifically".

"Why me?"

"Because you didn't die".

"Wait" I said smirking, "you want to cause chaos for me cause your pissed I didn't die when you threw me out through that window?"

"Exactly" he said happily, standing up.

"Sir, I believe is on his way" Jarvis said suddenly and I smirked as Loki tensed up.

"What?" I asked, "Scared that the Hulk will find you?"

"I'm not scared of anyone Stark".

"Well then you better get running, cause when Bruce gets mad, he tends to go for the crazy delusional God first and I'm not talking about Thor".

"Just keep your guard up Stark" Loki replied, his eyes shining mischievously, "you never know when someone could just… accidently… kill you".

"Is that a threat?"

"No, that's a promise".

Then he snapped his fingers and he was gone. Just like that. "Sir, is at the door" Jarvis announced a few seconds later. "Yea… let him in" muttered, "and don't you DARE utter a word about Reindeer Games to ANYONE, right?"

"As you wish sir".

"Thanks J".

Little did I know things were about to get a whole lot more interesting around here...

* * *

"Hey Brucey" I said cheerfully, grinning at him. All these forced smiles were really wearing me out.

"Tony" he said nodding.

"So what do I owe the pleasure of your company?" I asked, moving around some papers on my desk. Anything to keep busy. Keep busy and I didn't have time to think.

"Oh no reason… just paying a visit" he said breezily but I caught the meaning behind his words.

"I fine Bruce. You got to stop worrying" I said sighing as I turned to him.

He looked down embarrassed, "just worried you know. You seem too… un-Tony like".

"There's a Tony-like trait?" I asked amused and he grinned.

"Yea, someone who talks too much, annoys the hell out of people, and is a complete jerk".

"Harsh Banner, very harsh" I teased, clutching my heart dramatically and he laughed.

"Yea so… you sure your all righted?" he asked, suddenly serious again.

"Course. I got punched once by some maniac, I've taken worse". Hopefully the God could hear me say that.

"Right… it's just… I don't know… Forget it, see ya" Bruce said, walking back to the door.

"Yea… later" I muttered, staring after him.

* * *

As if on cue, the second Bruce was out of sight, there was a small flash and Loki appeared back on the counter he was previously sitting on. "Maniac am I?" he asked and I rolled my eyes, not bothering to turn to him, "that was for your benefit, not mine".

"Oh really? So I'm a crazed delusional moran as well am I?" he asked and I turned to face him.

"Yep".

"For someone who talks too much, is a complete Jerk, and annoys the hell out of people, you sure got some nerve" he said.

"So have you showing up here".

"Ah, well, we all do strange and confusing things at time" he replied smirking.

"Yea, and for you its permanent" I muttered and his grin immediately fell.

"I thought I already told you to watch that mouth of yours Stark" he told me, "didn't you learn from the last time?"

"Oh, this old thing?" I asked, tapping my jaw, ignoring the piercing pain that shook through my skull.

He frowned, standing up and taking a step forward, "would you care to have another bruise to match it?"

"And how do you expect me to explain that one to the other Avengers? Some guy magically broke into my lab, hit me once, and then disappeared?"

"Your problem not mine".

"Well It WILL be your problem when I tell your brother your back in New York".

He took a dangerous step forward, glaring with all his might, and WOW, Loki glare was scary. "You'll do good to refrain from bringing Thor into this Stark" he snarled, spitting out my name like it was a bad word, "he's not my brother".

"BUT, you care for him" I pointed out and a second later the God had me pinned to the wall. How is it even humanly possible for someone to move that fast… oh yea, he wasn't a humane was he… Why do all the back guys either have to be Gods or Aliens? It got really annoying sometimes.

"Now listen closely Stark. I hate Thor, Thor loves me. I hate Odin, Thor loves Odin, I hate you, Thor loves you. We have very different likes and tastes on this planet, and that does NOT make me care for him" he whispered. He was warning me, daring me, to go one step forward. And since I'm not the one to follow the rules, I couldn't let him down now could I?

"But you still care for him" I said once again and Loki pulled me back before slamming me against the wall again. And jeez did that hurt.

"I'm telling you Stark. One wrong move and I'll slit your throat".

"Okay, is that a figure of speech or are you actually serious on this?" I asked smirking.

"Oh I'm serious Stark" he said and suddenly he had a knife against my throat. Where the hell did the knife come from?

"One bad word from you, and this could end up getting closer than expected" he said and I grinned at him.

"Fuck you".

Loki glared and pressed the knife future against my throat, enough to cut the skin and cause blood, but not enough to actually kill me.

"You sure you don't want to rethink that?"

"Course not" I replied, way too cheerful for a man about to die, "if I did take it back, what would be the point in arguing".

"You really do have a screwed up mind don't you" he said. It wasn't a question. It was a statement. But I answered it anyway.

"Yes. Yes I do" I replied, "But you're the one with screwed up intentions".

Then suddenly the knife was gone, I was on the floor and he was calmly standing about three meters away.

"Tosú" he muttered before looking back up at me, "well . I'll be on my way".

Then, just like before, he simply vanished, leaving me sitting on the floor in a dazed heap, wondering what the fuck had just happened.

"I hate magic".

* * *

**Well that's it folks!**

**Chapter one of 'Before The Worst' now completed!  
**

**Thoughts so far? Good? Bad? Don't actually care? (If which you don't, why are you reading this?)  
**

**Until number two,**

**Rachel :)**


	2. Chapter 2

**Number 2 is now here!**

**Halleluiah! **

**Brief summary of this chapter: You just got to read it :P**

**Rachel :)**

* * *

The next few days passed in a blur and soon another two weeks were up. Two full weeks, 14 whole days, of no Loki. But he still occupied my mind. I was quieter than usual, not bothering to snap back with smart jokes or witty remarks when the others said something. All that was running through my mind was the same few words… "Trouble"…"Promise"… "Your Problem"… The same words going over and over again. I'm trying to take it back, before it all went wrong. But I can't. It happened. Loki was here to cause trouble, he had admitted it, and he was going to cause trouble for me specifically. I was screwed.

"Hey, Stark…STARK" someone said, waving their hand in front of my face. "Yea…wait, what?" I asked, surprised, looking around. Everyone was staring at me. Oh God

"You all right?" Natasha asked. Ah yes, Nat. That's who it was.

"Yea, why?" I asked, leaning back in the couch, trying to ignore their semi-worried/semi-confused gazes.

"You blanked out. Literally. I was yelling at you and you didn't even blink" she said slowly.

How do I dig myself out of this one? Let's see… I was sick? No, that won't work. Not when you had Banner in the room… I was tired? No, I had blanked out. I NEVER blank out when I'm tired… What about I was ignoring her? No, that was plain weird. No one could ignore Natasha when she was yelling. NO ONE. So I stuck with the one I always used. "Sorry…just thinking".

"You've been thinking a lot lately" Clint muttered, finally dropping his gaze.

I grinned at him, the smile as fake as the abdominal snowman, "Well, geniuses tend to think a lot".

He smirked, "don't flatter yourself playboy".

"Awww, that hurt Legolas, that was… that was cold…" I teased and the others relaxed, looking back to the T.V again, since, well according to them, I was back to my usual annoying joking self.

Little they did know.

* * *

I looked at each of the Avengers individually. They all seemed calm and relaxed, watching the film. Why was there a film on? On yea, Friday's movie night… What were we watching again? Ah well, it didn't really matter I guess. It was a distraction. And that's all I needed.

After another half hour of what I presumed was to be Pirates Of The Caribbean, I gave up on watching it. Loki's warnings over took my mind and was it just me, or did William Turner look just the slightest bit like Loki? It wasn't right. Thankfully, the team didn't notice my lack of concentration and I was left alone to my thoughts. "Trouble...Promise...Problem". The same three words over and over and over again. And it was killing me.

I didn't know what to do, didn't know what to say, I didn't even know what to think anymore... Loki said he was going to cause as much destruction for me as possible, and he more or less said that then he'll kill me. I was like a puppet. I could tell the others... no, I couldn't tell them. I could sort this out; I WOULD sort this mess out by myself. I didn't want anyone else to get involved…

About an hour later, the movie finally ended and I was the first to get up, forcing a yawn, muttering I was going to bed and left. "Hey! Tony!" someone called after me and I stopped, cursing under my breath before putting on a grin and turning to them. Clint.

* * *

"Hey Barton" I said casually and he stared at me for a minute.

"You ok?"

WHY THE FUCK DOES EVERYONE KEEP ASKING ME THAT? "Yea sure, why?" I asked and he looked around uneasily.

"You've just been acting strange and stuff" he mumbled.

Could I be any more obvious? "When did I EVER act normal?" I asked playfully and he smiled slightly.

"Yea, I guess that's true as well".

"Well…if that's all… I'm going to bed" I said, turning again. I was almost at the elevator when he called after me.

"WAIT!"

"Yea?" I asked.

"If…If there was something… anything… you would tell us wouldn't you?" he asked.

"Course I would" I lied, "we're a team aren't we?"

"Yea" he replied smiling, "night Tony".

"Night Clint".

* * *

The minute the elevator doors closed, I collapsed onto the floor. How could I DO that to him? How could I so easily lie to him? To the others? How could I DO THAT? I angrily hit my fist against the metal wall, not caring that it sent a shock wave of pain up my arm. How could I just do that to them? I was lying through my teeth the whole time. They didn't suspect a thing. And the worst part was, it was so easy…so simple…so basic to lie to them. I didn't feel guilty. I didn't feel sad. I didn't even feel any remorse. I was simply angry… Angry that I could betray them like that. Angry that I WAS lying. And angry at the fucking bastard who was making me to do it all. Loki bloody Laufeyson.

Maybe it was a dream. Maybe it was all a dream… Could it be a dream? Nightmares more like. Just wish it was a dream. Please, please, please let it all be a dream.

But no, it was no dream. When I opened my eyes at 3am the next morning, I was greeted by a stinging pain piercing through my hand from my elevator-hitting yesterday. Great. It defiantly couldn't be a dream then. I reluctantly rolled over, slowly sitting up. I might as well get up despite the early hour. I hadn't slept at all, and if I did, the nightmares overtook my mind. "Bloody Afghanistan" I muttered standing up.

"I would agree".

* * *

I jumped at the voice, literally tripping over the bed sheets and landing in a heap on the ground. "YOU again" I growled, flicking on the light. Loki was calmly sitting in a chair in the corner of my room as if he owned the place.

"Yes Stark. I'm back" he replied casually waving his hand in a friendly gesture. A FRIENDLY gesture? Loki simply didn't do friendly…

"You know I could have been naked" I said, untangling myself and standing up, looking down at my tracksuit pants.

The God frowned at the thought, "that's not a mental image I would care to imagine Stark".

I shrugged, "hey, you asked for it".

"Yes… I guess I kind of did… But you still didn't have to say it" he argued.

"Well what did you expect when you appear in my room at 3am?".

"True… why are you awake anyway?".

"What sort of a question is that? You're telling me if I didn't wake you'd sit there all statue-like and just watch me until I woke?" I shouted.

"You would do well to keep your voice down Stark. We wouldn't want any others to know you've got the bad guy in your bedroom" he said smirking and I rolled my eyes.

"Okay, first of all, this room is sound-proof, and second of all…EWWW. How could you possibly think of THAT?".

"Not that way you idiot" he growled.

"Yea whatever, I don't care" I said sighing, "what I do care of, is why THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING THIS?".

"Again with the shouting" he muttered.

Ok, just calm down. Breathe in, breathe out, breathe in, breathe out… why did I feel like a Yoga instructor? I picked up the sheets from the floor and put threw them on the bed, with a little more force than necessary, before calmly sitting down at the end of the bed, facing the God.

"There, was that so hard?" Loki asked grinning, "You really got to control that temper of yours".

"Yea, well it's rather difficult when you suddenly find out that a God's been watching you sleep since who knows when" I shot back as his grin widened.

"Just since you fell asleep…the first time. You have a habit of waking up quite a lot throughout the night".

"I noticed".

"And my guess it's been happening ever since Afghanistan" he continued and my head snapped up to him.

"Ah yes, I'm right aren't I?" he asked.

"It doesn't matter. That was a long time ago" I muttered.

"But it matters to you doesn't it? You talk about it in your sleep" he said quietly and I sighed, absentmindedly tapping the Arc Reactor. Loki's eyes drifted down to it.

"It was Afghanistan that you got that" he said and I nodded slowly.

I could remember everything, the Humvee truck, the bullets, the fighting… the bomb. Then the camera. The video they sent to Obie, then the Sharpel… it was… there was no words for it… the pain it caused… being operated on while you're still awake without any drugs… it was torture… complete torture…

"STARK" Loki snapped and I looked back up at him, the pain from the nightmares still etched across my face. "Yea?" I asked quietly. He stared at me briefly before abruptly standing up, "I must be going".

"See ya Rudolf" I muttered and he paused briefly, his gaze resting on me, before snapping his fingers and vanishing.

* * *

I sat there for a while, at the edge of my bed, just thinking… Just thinking… Loki didn't even explain what he was there for… Didn't even say anything but question me… Stupid God…

* * *

Eventually, I noticed I was shivering. What time was it? "Hey J, what's today like?" I asked quietly and a moment later the curtains opened. "Cloudy for most of the day, raining between 7pm to 9:30 pm. It is currently 6:47am and all but is up" Jarvis replied and I smiled slightly, "Thanks Jarv". "As always sir".

Deciding it was a respectable time to get up, I quickly got dressed before heading down to the kitchen. "Hey Stark" Natasha said, was too wide-awake for this time of the morning, wandering around the kitchen getting breakfasty things. "Hey Nat" I muttered as I sat down next to Bruce at the kitchen isle. "Rough night?" he asked as I rubbed my eyes. I shook my head, "just couldn't sleep". The parts I left out were the fact that I never did really sleep and that a mental God randomly appeared in my room at 3am and had been watching me sleep.

"Well, we have a more or less empty day today so you could stay back here if you wanted".

"…Thanks Banner".

"Anytime" he replied smiling.

It was KILLING me. How could he be so NICE to me? To a TRAITOR? To the man talking with the ENEMY? This was gone out of control. There were too many things happening at once. Too many questions… with too little answers… It was… just horrible… I HATED having no control over this. All because of a fucking half God. Loki. He had me climbing walls, and he knew it, but for whatever reason I didn't know. He wasn't trying to scare me, I knew that. And he was going to cause complete chaos for me, I knew that as well. And he had succeed, partly anyway. I was going out of my mind because of him, thinking over his words, trying to figure out what he had meant, and figuring out why he had a knife against my throat one minute, and the next he was having a… civilised chat… with me at 3am. His moods changed like the weather and it left me scrambling to catch up. Ok, I admit I may have fucked up a little.

* * *

Yawning, I put my head in my hands as Natasha sat down across from me, her breakfast already half gone. "Jeez you look like shit" she commented.

"Thanks" I replied, my voice muffled by my shirt sleeves. I didn't bother to raise my head. I just wanted to sleep. To finally be able to shut down my mind.

"Seriously Stark, you look like trash. When did you go to sleep last night?".

"I didn't".

"At all?" she asked surprised.

"Well not 'At all'. Just for an hour or so".

"What the hell kept you up?".

Let's see… a crazy God, flashbacks, panic attacks, nightmares, trouble, threats and… oh yea, I was going to die. But I couldn't tell them that so instead, I muttered the lamest excuse I ever came up with. "No idea".

* * *

"Good Morning Everybody" someone said cheerfully, skipping into the kitchen. Wait… skipping? "Hey Barton" Natasha muttered. Why was Legolas skipping? "Heya Tony" Clint said playfully and when I didn't reply, he decided to poke me.

"Do you HAVE a death wish?" I mumbled and he laughed.

"Looks like someone had a rough night" he said, "what cha do? Get completely wasted and fall asleep in the bath-tub?". That sounded perfect about now.

"Completely sober actually" Bruce filled in and I mentally thanked him. Thank God he understood these things.

"Sure, he is NOW. But what about last night?" Clint asked and I sighed.

"Nothing. Not even a whiskey" I replied.

"Wow, things must really be bad". He could say that again.

"I'm going back to bed" I announced, standing back up, "and unless you want to die a slow, painful, horrible death. DON'T WAKE ME".

Barton laughed at that but quickly shut up when I shot him a glare. "Can it feathers".

* * *

I didn't bother changing again when I made it to my room. I just shut my bedroom door, glanced around for any stalking Gods, before falling face-first onto the bed. My lovely, warm, cosy bed…

Bullets. There were bullets. And… explosions. Yes, that was defiantly an explosion… Then… oh no. Oh God no… Not this again… Not Afghanistan… Not again…

Dead. The soldiers were dead. All of them. Then I was getting out of the jeep and running for cover. No! NO! This could NOT be happening! I knew it was a dream, a nightmare, even a flashback, but no matter what I did, I couldn't wake myself. I had to watch it all again. Everything…

Then a bomb landed next me, Stark Industries written across it. You know you're fucked when a bomb lands next to you and LITERALLY has your name on it.

Then it exploded, and I sent flying backwards, landing painfully on the burning hot sand. There was a ringing in my ears and my head was pounding. And then the pain started. A burning like feeling spreading through my chest. Reaching down, I pulled open my shirt. And there was the sharpel. It had pierced through the bullet-proof vest and dark red blood was slowly but surely spreading across my chest. Then everything faded and my vision went black.

The next thing I was aware of was the operation. I was screaming, shouting, trashing about. Anything to stop them from causing any more pain. There was about three men holding me down, another two cutting open my chest. Why couldn't they just let me die? Someone put a rag over my nose and mouth and then I was unconscious again.

But the pain was still there. The burning… piercing… impossible pain. I just wanted it to end. I was begging them to stop. I was actually reduced to begging. But they weren't listening. They completely ignored me. The pain… I just wanted it to end.

"Stark…Stark…". Yinsen. "Make it stop" I pleaded, "just make it stop". The pain was still there. Why couldn't they see that? Why wouldn't they stop? "Please" I begged, "just make it go away". "STARK" the voice was more urgent now. Was that…? "TONY". That wasn't Yinsen…

* * *

I felt someone shaking me awake and then I shot bolt upright, gasping for breath. "Deep breathes" someone said soothingly. Who was that? "Stark if you don't calm down I swear I'll get Bruce". That was… Natasha. Only the Russian would make threats like that. Groaning, I fell back against the headboard of my bed and looked up at her. "Hey Nat".

"Hey Stark" she replied, "At least now I know why you weren't sleeping".

"Don't you dare tell anyone".

"Don't worry, I won't" she replied, "but with flashbacks like that you're a serious contestant for PSD".

"I'm fine".

"No. You're not. My guess is Afghanistan and if it is then this isn't the first time you've had the panic attack".

"It wasn't a panic attack" I muttered.

"So I'm right about Afghanistan then? Jeasus Stark how long has this been going on for?".

"Ever since it happened" I mumbled and she sighed, before hitting me over the back of the head.

"You are such an idiot. Why the hell didn't you tell anyone?" she asked frustrated.

I shrugged, "doesn't matter".

"You know what? I give up" she said after another few minutes, "now come on Moran, we're going out for dinner".

"Oh so that's why you were in my room? It wasn't just to admire the view?" I asked smirking and she rolled her eyes, "if that's the view, you're not going to get any buyers". I just continued to grin at her.

* * *

Half an hour later we were at some pizza hut, chatting and laughing at stupid things and trying to ignore the passer-by's stares and pointing's. Yea we were the Avengers, eating pizza, get over it. The food was good, the company was good, and, basically, the evening would have been perfect, if it weren't for Natasha occasionally shooting me a worried glance, and obviously the fact that Loki's words were still playing over and over again in the back of my head.

"Any word from Thor?" Bruce asked and Steve shook his head.

"Nothing".

"Probably tied up at Asgard" Banner mused.

"Loki business" Steve agreed.

Okay, don't tense up, don't act any differently. Remain calm. It was just a stupid God. Nothing major. But I knew I was only fooling myself. It was Loki. "I've already caused more trouble than you can possibly imagine". "Your problem". "That's a promise". Stupid, meaningless words if it was anybody else. But since it was a demented, evil, take-over-the-world type of God who always kept his word, I was a little worried. Just a little.

Thankfully they left the whole Loki-business at that and the rest of the meal was back to noisy chatter and laughing. Unforcently, it was about to get a whole lot worse.

* * *

"Man I'm full" Clint moaned as we got back to the tower.

"You had three 12inch pizzas. What do you expect?" I asked laughing.

"Hey, Cap had five!" he shot back.

"That's cause Capcicle has a big appetite" I replied smirking, "you don't. You just like food".

"Is that so bad? Liking good food?".

"Is it if it's someone like you".

"Guys come on, no teasing" Natasha said walking between us.

"Yes, mother" I said playfully and she rolled her eyes.

"Do you WANT to keep down your pizza Stark?".

"OK, OK, Shutting up now" I said, raising my hands in defeat. And it would have ended like that, all happy and playfully, if Banner hadn't called us into the sitting room and turned on the T.V to the news channel. I could immediately feel everyone's gaze land on me, but I was too shocked to move. The leading story was a picture of me on the street, and standing next to me, to whom I was obviously talking to, was none other than Reindeer Games himself.

* * *

Loki. Fucking. Laufeyson.

* * *

**Chapter 2 is now complete!**

**Cgapter 3, coming soon!**

**Rachel**


	3. Chapter 3

**Oooh, but of a cliff hanger last Chapter.**

**This is Number 3, Chapter 3, whatever pleases you to call it,**

**And things are about to blow up**

**Rachel :)**

* * *

"As you can see, Tony Stark, aka. Iron Man, was seen yesterday by a passer-by, talking to the Avengers enemy, Loki Laufeyson, Adoptive brother of Thor Odison, also in the Avengers" the news reporter said, "And while it is not known whether the Avengers are calling a truce with the God of Lie's, or if Stark simply ran into him, this sure is not something you see every day". Bruce turned off the T.V after that, but I continued to stare at the blank screen. "Trust me Stark; I've already caused more trouble than you can imagine". The Gods words flashed back to me. So this is what he had meant by trouble. He had planned the whole thing!

* * *

"Please be to god tell me this is not true" Clint said quietly.

I didn't reply. "Trust me Stark; I've already caused more trouble than you can imagine". Trouble… Trouble… Trouble…

"For fucks sake Stark. IS IT TRUE?" Natasha asked and I nodded slowly, still staring at the black T.V screen.

"Jeasus Christ" she muttered, "What the hell were you thinking?"

What was I thinking? I should have ran, I should have called for help, I should have completely ignored him. But no, my own god damn stubbornness kept me standing there. Kept me talking to the God while some stranger took a photo and spread it across the news. If I wasn't still in shock I would be tearing the house down. Loki. The bastard.

"STARK" Natasha yelled, shaking me by the shoulders, "What the HELL happened?"

"It was a setup" I muttered, the shock finally disappearing.

"What?" she asked and I looked down at her, the anger easily visible across my face".

"It. Was. A. FUCKING. SET. UP" I shouted through gritted teeth.

She took a step back in surprise. "A set up?"

"Yes. A set up" I replied, the words rushing out, "it was two weeks ago, why they only got the picture now I don't know. I wanted coffee so I went down to Starbucks and then I walked back here. Then half way back to the tower, this random cat appeared and then it was Loki and then he was threating me and then I was teasing him and then he hit me and then-".

"Wo, wo, wo, back up" Clint interrupted, "HE was the one who punched you?"

"Of course he was the one who punched me. If it was an actual humane I would have punched back. But since it was a God with super human strength I couldn't" I explained, "well, actually I could, but I'd probably break my wrist and he wouldn't feel a thing so it would have no effect-".

"STARK" Steve barked, "Back to the story".

"Ok, right, right, the story, yes" I started, "where was I? Oh yea, so he hit me and for obvious reasons I didn't hit back and then he went on telling me about his sightseeing tour in New York and I was telling him to get lost and then he went on about saying how he was going to cause destruction and mayhem and I was kind of like 'right, yea, course you are' and then he went all Shakespeare on me saying 'choose your words carefully or they may be your last' and then that's when he actually punched me and man did that hurt then he was all like 'I pissed that you didn't die when I threw you through the towers window and now I'm going to cause you loads of trouble', well, actually those words were mine but he basically said that in a more civilised kind of way. Then he clicked his fingers and poof he was gone. Then he randomly appeared in my lab and tried to kill me, so I told him he was completely fucked up" I continued, "though not exactly in those words cause he had a knife and an angry God is not very nice when it comes to people like me, then Jarvis said Bruce over there was on his way and Reindeer games gave the whole 'I'm going to cause you trouble again' speech and then he said he promised to kill me when he had had his fun. Then he clicked him fingers and he did a Houdini on me again, then Banner appeared and gave his speech and then last night I woke up at 3am and Rudolf was in my room and started asking loads of random questions, he never really did get to the point, then I kind of zoned off and he vanished again and then I just stayed there until I decided to get up and then I went to the kitchen and ye know the rest from there" I finished, all in one breath.

"He could talk for America" Bruce finally muttered, running a hand through his hair.

They all stared at me shocked and… angry… at the same time. Then of course, Natasha went all 'Girly' on me and slapped me across the face. "YOU FUCKING MORAN" she shouted, "WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ANYONE?"

"Well I was going to tell P-"I started but she cut me off, "no lie's Stark".

"Ok, ok, so I wasn't going to tell anyone" I admitted, holding my hands up in defence.

"Sir there appears to be a disturbance in your room" Jarvis said suddenly and they all looked at me confused. It took me a few seconds to realise what it was.

"Loki you fucking bastard" I muttered, turning and striding down the hall to my room. This was about to get interesting.

* * *

"All right you moran, come on" I said loudly as I through open the door to my bedroom, "I know you're here idiot, J's got motion sensors".

A split second later someone had caught me by the collar of my shirt and had pinned me to the wall with a knife at my throat. I grinned up at him, "Heya Loks".

"I warned you Stark" he hissed, the knife slowly pressing harder into my neck.

"Warned me of what? All I know is that you're a complete physcotic Frost Giant who has a liking for hurting people. Seriously man, that's sadistic" I replied grinning.

He slammed me against the wall, "be careful with your words Stark-".

"Let me guess" I interrupted, "Is it somewhere along the lines of 'Be careful with your words Stark, they may be your last'? Cause that sentence is seriously getting too Cliché".

"I'm warning you. Don't. Test. Me".

"Yea, I got that the last three times we met".

"I told you not to tell anyone. You weren't to breathe a word. And now the whole Avengers know" he hissed.

"Ok, yea, firstly, I can't take you seriously in that hat. Antlers? Horns? What are they?" I asked, "Secondly, you never actually said it, I kind of just presumed not to. And Thirdly, last but not least, we're a team. We do things together. And I wish I had told them sooner".

"Aw, look at that. You're going soft Stark is your old age".

"I'm 36. Your…what? 403?" I asked and he glared at me.

"As you get older you get wiser".

"That's normally the case Rudolf, but when it comes to you, I think the correct word would be 'Delusional'… or maybe 'Crazy'… They both suit you".

"Just as 'Dead Man' suits you" he replied and I laughed.

"Dead Man? Honestly? That's the best comeback you can think off? Jeez man, I gotta give you a crash course in the jokes department".

"Shut it Stark. Do you ever say something worth listening to?"

"Only if the person is worth talking to" I replied grinning.

"Why you dare mock me mortal?"

"You know, that sounded freakishly like Thor there".

"You. Dare. To compare me. To. My. BROTHER?" he yelled.

"Oh, so you admit he's your brother now?" I asked, "Well, that's good. You're past the denial stage then".

"I swear to you Stark, these are the last words you're going to hear-" he started but I cut him off again.

"You really got to get over yourself. The last words I'm going to hear, is going to be myself telling the team that I'm gonna miss them, and telling that certain person, girlfriend or wife, that I love them. And you never know, I might even have a few kids. But It's NOT going to be your annoying stupid voice telling me that you're to kill me".

"What was all that? Your life's confessions? Or were you just emptying your heart out to me?" the God sneered. He was so sure of himself. Well, time to burst his bubble.

"No, that was neither of those things" I replied smirking, "that was merely a distraction".

* * *

"Back away from the jerk Rudolf" Clint warned and the God turned to him surprised. While I had been chatting away to Rock of Ages here, the rest of the team had gotten their weapons, now all of which were pointed at Loki. Arrows, guns, a shield, and Brucey was on the verge of Hulking out, his eyes dangerously bright green.

Loki smirked at them before turning back to me, pulling me in close and stabbing something into my stomach. A knife. Resisting the urge to cry out, I tried to concentrate on what the God was saying. "You should watch your stomach Stark" he whispered, "we wouldn't want your dinner all over this nice clean carpet now would we?" Then he was gone, running towards the window, the team shooting whatever they had after him. I barely noticed. There was a ringing in my ears and I felt sick to the bone. Forcing myself to look down, I almost puked. Loki had wedged a sharp knife into my stomach; I couldn't even see the blade. All I could see was blood. Biting down on the collar of my jacket to stop myself from accidently biting my tongue, I pulled out the knife by the handle, screaming into the leather. It was only then the team seemed to notice me. Clasping a hand over the deep gash to minimize the bleeding, I held the knife up to the light.

* * *

"Nobody panic" I managed to say, "but I MAY have been stabbed".

* * *

Then I collapsed onto the ground and everything went black.

* * *

**Another CLIFF HANGER!**

**Shorter than usual but hopefully it was worth it!**

**So Stark explained everything and Loki escaped again,**

***Dramatic sigh* Ah well, I'm sure things will get better…. Maybe…. MWHAAAAAA**

**Okay, yea, I'm rubbish at evil laughs :)**

**Rachel**


	4. Chapter 4

**The wait is over!**

**Chapter 4 is here!**

**Thank you to everyone for the positive, brilliant reviews!**

**Hope ye like it,**

**Rachel :)**

* * *

When I finally woke, everything was fuzzy and hazy, not to mind the pounding pain in my head. Where was I? Everything was white… the floor… the ceiling… the walls…. Everything. Was this heaven? No, you can't go to heaven when your born hell bound. And there was a smell… disinfectant. Great. I was in a hospital then. Where was everybody? Why was I here? …..Oh yea. Loki stabbed me. Loki…. The Avengers knew everything. It was on the news. This meant SHIELD saw it… This meant Fury saw it… I was screwed.

* * *

Slowly I twitched my hand, trying to break past the morphine. I hated drugs. Then all the feeling returned and a sharp pains shot across my stomach. Wish I hadn't moved now. I moved over my hand to find my stomach completely bandaged. That meant stitches. That meant a scar. Loki had officially scarred me. Whoop-De-Doo. Sighing, I put back down my hand and closed my eyes, trying to think. The others would have filled in Fury on what I had told them, but he would want a proper debriefing from me the minute he knew I was awake. That was going to be fun. Then the team… they would obviously hate me for lying and not telling them but, over time, they would forgive and forget… eventually. Then, who else? Oh yes, Rhodey. Rhodey wouldn't care as long as he thought I was doing the right thing and all that. What about Thor? He would be all over me, wanting to know what Loki had said, where I had seen him, everything basically. And then… Pepper. Oh god. What would Pep think? She would be furious. Then angry. Then upset I didn't tell her. And then she's cool down and realise the reasons why I did it. And finally she would accept my decisions and give that 'You-have-to-trust-me-sometimes' speech, I will feel really guilty for a few days, and then everything would be grand again. Hopefully.

* * *

I faintly remember someone coming in but I was already half asleep. Then someone sat down next to me, and judging by their loud footfalls, it wasn't either of the assassins. Bruce wasn't as quiet as Clint or Natasha when walking, but he was still quiet, so it wasn't him. And Thor would be all laughter and have a loud voice. So it wasn't him. That left either Fury, or Capcicle. "You're fucked when you wake up Stark".

Yep, that was Fury. Steve simply didn't curse. I kept my eyes closed though, just resting. Besides, I wanted to hear what he had to say when he thought I wasn't listening. You learn a lot from someone if they don't realise you're listening to them.

"Seriously Stark. All this Loki business. What the fuck were you thinking?" he asked, "we managed to cover up the press but what you saw on the news… that's been seen by hundreds of people already. All of Manhattan maybe, who knows?" It was silent for another few minutes.

"For FUCKS SAKE Stark, he's the bad guy! WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU THINKING?" He shouted. I should have known ole Nicky's temper wouldn't last that long. He sighed and I could almost picture him with his head in his hands frustrated.

"He's Loki" Fury muttered, "He's a fucking God. And now he's gone". Silence.

"You should have told someone. Anyone. Instead of going around the place looking over your shoulder for the past two fucking weeks. Then you wouldn't have gotten your bloody guts cut out". Was that…? Was that sadness in his voice? Was he… was he worried about me? I couldn't help it, I burst out laughing.

* * *

His head snapped up, and I laughed even harder at his surprised expression.

"You're… Your f-face" I spluttered, tears forming in my eyes from laughing do much. I didn't even care it was absolutely killing my stomach. He actually cared, no how matter how much he refused to. "You… you heard ALL that?" he asked and another outburst of laughter confirmed it. He immediately turned angry, his expression murderous as he started yelling thunderously at me.

"YOU FUCKING BASTARD, YOU WERE AWAKE THE WHOLE GOD DAMN TIME!"

"I… I c-couldn't resist. It w-was… too good to i-ignore" I choked out, wiping the tears from my eyes.

"FOR FUCKS SAKE STARK" he shouted, "WONT YOU EVER GROW UP?"

"I'm n-not throwing… t-the toddler t-tantrum here" I said grinning. This was going to be brilliant.

* * *

I was still laughing my heart out, and Fury was still yelling and cursing me 20 minutes later when the other Avengers arrived, minus Thor. "Should we just…? Maybe we'll come back another time" Natasha said, staring at us confused.

"No" Fury snapped, pointing to the other chair in the room, "all of ye. In here. Now".

"You're… Your face" I said again, and Fury growled at me. He literally GROWLED at me. Then he glared and damn, Fury glare was scary. But I couldn't stop laughing.

"You c-cared" I said, "You actually got worried over-".

"SHUT. THE. FUCK. UP. STARK" he hissed and I reduced my laughing to a grin.

"You gotta admit, you actually giving a damn about me is quiet hilarious" I said and he took a dangerous step forward.

"If you tell anyone. ANYONE. About this. Even the Avengers. I swear to god I'll be the one slicing you stomach the next time" he said quietly, his voice an obvious warning.

"Fine, fine, fine. Your secrets safe with me Nicky" I said, raising both hands, "I won't tell anyone".

"Won't tell what?" Clint asked quietly and I started laughing again.

"You've just set off World War 3" Fury hissed, turning to Barton, "Nothing that you need to know. Now Stark better have fucking calmed down when I get back, or they'll be hell to pay". He shot me another death glare before leaving and I quickly shut up. Until the door shut behind him. Then I started laughing all over again.

* * *

"What was that about?" Bruce asked staring after the one-eyed man.

"He… He thought I was still unconscious. And he basically poured his heart out to me" I explained, finally calming down and reducing my laughter to a smirk.

"Seriously? Fury emotional? Hard to believe" Natasha said.

"Yep. As you can imagine, I found it rather funny" I replied and she smirked.

"Kind of?"

"Yea… I really should have videoed it… does this place have camera's?" I asked looking around; spotting a small black box in the corner of the room, a red light signalling it was on, "yep. There it is. I'll get Jarvis to send every SHIELD agent a copy".

"You're unbelievable".

"Thanks".

* * *

"So what do I owe the pleasure?" I asked after a few silent minutes. They all glanced at each other warily and I sighed, "Spit it out. It can't be that bad".

Clint was finally the one to speak up. "Fury thinks you're working with Loki".

"…Ok, that is bad" I muttered, looking around at each of them. They all looked… ashamed… and avoided my gaze. It was only then I realised. "You've GOT to be kidding me" I exclaimed, "Ye're with him? You think that I'm actually dumb enough to work with Loki?"

"Well… I don't want to, but if the hat fits…." Natasha trailed off.

"Me? With Loki? Can you honestly imagine two completely annoying jerks working with each other?" I asked. They didn't reply. They actually thought…

"What about you Rogers?" I asked coldly, "You're the leader. You kicking me out?"

He looked around uneasily, "I'm sorry Tony. If there wa-".

"Don't" I cut him off, "Don't you DARE say 'If there was any other way'. We both know there isn't. So don't waste your breath". He seemed taken aback by my harshness but who cares? They thought I was stupid enough, dumb enough, and completely moronic enough to work with HIM? Of all people they thought I would work with. Of all the people to presume something like that…. The single 4 people I trusted… And they broke it. They broke the one, single, most important thing they knew I was the most vulnerable about. They broke my trust.

"Go" I heard myself saying.

"What?" Banner asked and I leant back, closing my eyes.

"Just go" I said quietly, "ye don't want to be here. Not with a traitor. So ye can go".

"Tony please, it's not like that" Nat pleaded.

"Go" I said, louder this time, "just… just go".

I heard a few shuffles, then a door opening, and finally, the door closed. I let out a shaky breath, opening my eyes again, and swearing to myself that the tears were from laughing. Not from the fact that my only friends betrayed me. Not sad tears.

* * *

After another two days, I was allowed to go home… well… the tower wasn't home anymore. Home was where the heart was. Home was wear your family was. And home was where your friends were. So the Avenger Tower was no longer my home.

The next few days were… rocky… to say the least. The others tried to talk to me. I didn't want to talk. So my answers were blunt and short. And eventually they gave up, and now were ignoring me. Pepper found out what happened, and took my side. She knew how fragile my trust was. She was the first to earn it. And she knew that the others were going on no actual proper proof. So she was on my side. Pepper did talk to them of course, but she was more… abrupt than before, making it obvious she was angry with them.

* * *

I spent all my time in the lab, working on random things, the suit, the coffee machine, the alarm clock. Anything to keep me busy. I even slept down there most nights. Pepper would visit every 2 or 3 days and she'd always bring food, pizza one day, taco's the next. And we'd just sit down there, having dinner, and just talk about whatever was happening. Mostly she talked as nothing was actually happening in my life at the moment, and I was content to simply sit back and listen to her ramblings. It became a sort of tradition, a custom. The same thing every week. And it was nice, having someone to talk to, not being totally isolated away from the outside world. And it was all going perfect… Until a certain God Of Mischief showed up.

* * *

**Another cliff hanger *sigh***

**Ah well, the next chapter shall be up and posted tonight as well so stay tuned!**

**Rachel :)**


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5 is now taking flight**

**TO MORE READERS!**

**WOO-HOO!**

**Random act of craziness there… was quiet fun….**

**And now, let the Stark Games begin.**

**May the odds be ever in your favour**

**Rachel**

* * *

"Hello Stark". I spun around at the voice, immediately jumping up and getting ready to fight. Loki.

"YOU" I yelled and he smirked.

"ME".

"What game do you think you're playing at?" I asked angrily.

"Well it was 'Get-Stark-to-be-known-as-a-traitor' and then 'Kill-Stark-Dramatically'. But since neither of those really worked, I'm thinking more of a 'Make-Everyone-Believe-Stark-betrayed-them' approach" he replied casually.

"Well lucky you, they already think that" I muttered.

"No, they think you're working with ME".

"Isn't that what you want?"

"No, I was thinking more along the lines of YOU being the bad guy and that I was working FOR you rather than WITH you" he replied.

"Well if that's true, and you are, in fact, my employee, YOU'RE FIRED".

"Harsh Stark, so harsh. But no. That is only the beginning".

"I thought it might be".

He ignored me and continued his little scheming. "First, I'm going to make them think you're the traitor, the betrayer in all of this. Next I'm going to publicly disgrace you so much everyone'll hate you. Then I'm going to get all of SHIELD and the Avengers to turn on you. And when you go into hiding, I'm going to kill you painfully and slowly and make it look like suicide".

"You sure you're going to remember all that Rudolf? I mean, that's quite a long list, I wouldn't want your pretty little head getting an overload".

He glared at me for that while I simply smirked back. Hey, if he was going to make this hard for me. I was going to make hard for him. Two could play at that game.

"Well Stark. Send my condolences to all your friends and-".

"They're NOT my friends" I replied, cutting him off.

"Oh? The Avengers? SHIELD? They're NOT you friend?" Loki asked amused, "and why ever not?"

"Because friends don't betray each other. Friends don't believe in theory rather than evidence. And FRIENDS don't believe you're working with a PHYSCO, LUNITIC, CRAZY, FUCKING BASTARD" I shouted and he smirked at me.

"Lunatic and Crazy I've heard, but Physco? That's a new one".

Angrily, I picked up the wrench next to me, flinging it towards him. It simply hit the wall and bounced back, where a second ago he was standing. "Don't forget my promise Stark" someone whispered from behind me and I spun around only to face air. That was it. I was alone. He was gone.

* * *

"J, you get all that?" I asked.

"One fully recorded and videoed conversation of you with saved sir" he replied and I smirked, "Good. Send it to Fury. Tell him this is his proof that I'm not working with the bad guys".

"As you wish sir".

"Oh, and Jarv?" I asked, turning back to my work.

"Yes sir?"

"Good work".

* * *

It was barely half an hour later when Fury was banging on the lab door. "Turn the music up will you J?" I asked, ignoring the director, and soon his bangs were blocked out by the speakers blaring 'Highway To Hell'. AC/DC. Good choice. "Sir I believe is shouting for you to let him in" Jarvis said a few seconds later.

"What does he want to say?" I asked calmly, continuing the work on the coffee machine. You could never have too much coffee.

"He says he got the video with you and and now he just wants to talk".

"In those exact words?" I asked amused, looking up at the camera.

"Well, no, sir. I did a bit of filtering. He tends to swear a lot" Jarvis replied truthfully and I smirked.

"That's more like it".

"Shall I let him i-"J started but he was cut off by four sudden bangs.

"Turn the music down J" I muttered and a second later I could hear Fury's yelling.

"Glass is bullet proof Nicky… And missile proof… And nuclear bomb proof… And, actually, is resistant to little hand grenades, you know the ones that make the bang but don't actually explode? Yea, those" I said, not bothering to turn to him.

"For Christ's sake Stark, open the FUCKING DOOR" he yelled and I sighed, putting down the screwdriver and turning to him.

"That type of language won't get you anywhere Nicky" I said, grinning at him. He glared in response.

"Let me in Stark" he ordered and I sighed again, looking up at the camera, "What do you think Jarv? Should I let in ole' St. Nick here?"

"Practically sir, you should. But personally, he did betray you" came the AI's perfect response. Smirking, I turned back to Fury, pointing at the camera over my shoulder, "Jarvis doesn't WANT to let you in. So, give me a good reason as to why you want to shout at me, and he might change his mind".

"For fuck sake Stark, Jarvis is a MACHINE!" Fury yelled.

"Ouch. That hurt. You ok J?" I asked.

"I am offended sir, but I'm sure could do better with the convincing". Man, I loved that guy sometimes.

"Fine. Jarvis, I'm sorry" Fury muttered.

"What was that?" I asked.

"I'm sorry" he said, slightly louder this time.

"Beg your pardon, but would you remind repeating that once more so I can hear you?" I asked and he glared at me with all his might.

"For fucks sake Stark. I'M SORRY" he shouted and I turned back to the camera.

"What do you think J? Did he mean it?".

"I don't believe he did sir, but I accept his apology none the less" Jarvis replied and I sighed, "Fine, let old bat and boots in then". A second later, the door slid open and Fury came storming in. Man, he looked like he was about to start World War 3. Maybe I pushed it too far this time… Nah, he deserved it.

* * *

"Heya Nicky" I said cheerily, turning back to the coffee machine. If I could just tweak it a little bit so Jarvis could pick it up…

"HEYA? THAT'S ALL YOU CAN SAY?" he yelled and I glanced up at him.

"Would you like a Good Morning? Or a Good Evening? Cause, truth be told, I have no idea what time it is".

"It's the 13th June 2013 and it is as of NOW… 6:03pm" he yelled.

"Ah, well, Good Evening then" I replied calmly and he slammed his fist on the table.

"WHAT. THE. FUCK. ARE. YOU. DOING?".

"Building a coffee machine".

"I swear to God" he muttered, before suddenly turning angry again and throwing down, rather forcefully I might add, a small DVD disk. "THIS STARK. THIS".

* * *

I reached over and picked it up, turning it around in my hands. "J?" I asked. "All ready loading sir". A split second later, and the conversation of Loki and I was projected onto the wall in front of us. "Oh, that? That's just the proof I have so far of NOT working with the messed up God" I replied, tossing him the disk again.

"And how the FUCK am I meant to know it wasn't all a SET-UP?" he yelled and I sighed, leaning back in the stool.

"Because, my dear Nicky, HE FUCKING STABBED ME" I shouted back.

"Yet you're still alive here today. Doesn't that seem even the slightest bit suspicious to you?" he asked and I shrugged, "I wouldn't know. I was too busy trying not to die… And bleed all over my nice clean carpet…"

"My view still stays the same Stark. There is a possibility that you are working with Loki, and you're going to need a shit lot more evidence than THAT to convince me otherwise" he replied.

"Oh, so it's just a POSSIBILITY now that I working with Rudolf? Cause over the past… how many weeks have I been here? 4. Yea, for the past 4 weeks since I got out of that blasted hospital, you seemed to know for certain that I was with Reindeer Games" I shot back as he headed for the door. "In fact" I continued, "The only thing I think is stopping you from arresting me is in case you turn out to be wrong. Which you will just so you know. And you don't want to be embarrassed do you Nicky?".

* * *

He paused at the door, seeming to think over my words. "If I am wrong Stark" he said, "then I'll make sure you get my sincerest apologies".

"And until then? What am I supposed to do? Live my life down here for the next couple of months? Cause that's really starting to get difficult" I asked.

"…The team talking to you?" he asked.

"I'm not part of the Avengers anymore. Why would they?".

"Rogers kicked you out then? Its official?" he asked, turning to me.

"Well it's not down in writing if that's what you mean, but yea, I'm done. No thanks to you".

"…When was the last time you talked to them? …..When was the last time you left this lab?"

I shrugged, "three weeks. For both of your questions. They don't come down here, I don't go up there. We've got mutual feelings towards each other. Which, basically, translates to we want nothing to do with each other".

"That bad, huh? Well you could always come clean and admit to working with Loki".

"For the last FUCKING time. I. AM. NOT. WORKING. WITH. THAT. MOTHERFUCKING. LUNATIC" I yelled, running a hand through my all-ready quite messy hair.

"Yea well until I get some FUCKING evidence of that. IT LOOKS LIKE YOU ARE" he shouted back, before stomping through the door and back over to the elevator, "We'll be in touch Stark". Evidence huh? That's all he wanted… evidence. What happened to the whole 'Innocent-Until-Proven-Guilty' law then? Evidence… Such a hard thing to find… Justice. That's what I needed. Not evidence… "Sir, is approaching" Jarvis said, cutting me out of my thoughts. "Yea let her in" I muttered, turning back to my work. For now, Justice would have to wait…

* * *

**DUN DUN DAH!**

**What cha all think?**

**Will Stark be able to keep up as the plot thickens?**

**Will Loki get his way?**

**Or will the Avengers finally start believing the truth?**

**Untillllllllllllllllllllllllll Next Time,**

**Rachel :)**


	6. Chapter 6

**This is, HALF-A-DOZEN!**

**Chapter 6!**

**I say this story will be a longer one than The End Where I Begin (or TEWIB for short, its easier to say)**

**TEWIB had 8 chapters… This'll have at least 10 I say…. Ha, it'll probably be 13 chapters or another supposedly unlucky number… 13 is actually my favourite number, mainly because everyone else hates it. It needs a friend too!**

**ANYWAYSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS,**

**Welcome to the Half A Dozen chapter,**

**Enjoy,**

**Rachel**

* * *

**-CHAPTER 6-**

Man, I hated hangovers. It was like a constant pounding in the back of my head and every, tiny, little sound or noise would make it work overtime. Even bright lights were annoying me… Jeez, I'd NEVER gotten this drunk before. Aren't Hangovers meant to be the morning AFTER you got drunk? Well, maybe it wasn't a hangover… maybe I was simply after over-drinking…..Is that even POSSIBLE for me? Maybe it is… Maybe it isn't… All I know is that it's been two weeks since Fury yelled at me for sending him the tape, and Pepper had left for some conference meeting in London, so I got ridiculously drunk and now I'm paying the price… Man, I hated hangovers… Did I ever mention that before? ….Oh yea. I did. And it wasn't a hangover was it? Cause I was still drinking. And I was still drunk. Man, I'm wasted…

* * *

A huge banging set off the alarm clock in my head again and I looked around angrily for the source of the noise… The door. Someone was at the door… Normally that didn't cause a huge rattling… Then again, everything seems magnetized when your drunk.

"J-Jarv… who i-is it-t?" I asked.

" sir. She appears to be wanting to come in" he replied.

"…..L-let her i-i-in" I finally said. I had nothing better to do. And I was sure she was only going to yell at me, so why not get it over and done with now, and be after forgetting half of it tomorrow? I heard the door slide open, yet another loud noise, and then loud footsteps walking over to me… loud footsteps? Natasha never had ANY sound of footsteps. She was completely quiet…

"No food" someone muttered. Hey… wasn't that? Wasn't that… Bruce? I thought it was Natasha that was here?

"What else is new?" someone asked quietly. Ah, there we are, that was Natasha's voice. So both Natasha AND Bruce were here… would explain the footsteps… and the fact Bruce was worried about food…

"Heya Tony" Natasha said cheerfully, sitting up on the edge of my desk. Why was she so happy?

"Have… Have you been drinking?" Bruce asked, standing next to her.

"I've n-not *been* d-drinking. I *am*d-d-drinking" I replied miserably, holding up the whiskey bottle and he sighed, grabbing it and holding the bottle out of my reach.

"H-HEY!" I complained, reaching for it but he held it back future.

"NO. ALCOHOL. STARK" Nat warned and I turned to her surprised, only remembering now that she was actually there. Wow I was fucked up. Bruce shook the bottle, frowning when he didn't hear anything.

"Empty" Natasha muttered, "Stark where the rest of the bottles?".

"W-what bottles?" I asked, hiccupping.

"You could drink for Russia Stark, and that's pretty difficult. So I know that one whiskey bottle does NOT make you this drunk" she replied, "so where are the other bottles?".

"Not t-telling" I said smirking. Even when I was drunk I knew to keep my hidden alcohol stash a secret.

"…How many bottled of whiskey HAVE you had?" Bruce asked, setting down the bottle on my desk.

"…Bout 3 w-whiskey….and… 3? ...4? S-scotch?" I replied. Id honestly lost count after the first two.

"Jeasus you need help" Natasha muttered.

* * *

"W-what do you w-want Nat?" I grumbled, spinning the empty whiskey bottle around in my hand… I could make something out of that…

"Oh, nothing really. Just some answers" she replied casually and I narrowed my eyes at them.

"So y-you're the… you're the brains" I said pointing at her before turning to Bruce, "and your… you t-the m-muscle".

Nat laughed at that, "pretty much".

"F-fine… Questions, s-shoot" I muttered, "g-got nothing better t-to do anywaysss".

"Are you working with Loki?" she asked, taking my wrist… Lie detector test.

"No" I replied and she glanced at Bruce.

"Are you working for him?" she asked again.

"N-no" I said. Another look at Bruce.

"Are you anyways involved with Loki?".

"Besides f-for the r-random pop-ups h-he likes to do, no".

"Are you involved with any bad guys?".

"No".

"Are you currently avoiding the Avengers and everyone but Pepper?".

"…..Yes".

"Are you currently drunk right now?".

"Id like t-to say no… but t-that would be a l-lie. So, yes" I replied and she laughed softly.

"Did you lie about any of your previous answers?" she asked and I shook my head.

"Nope".

"Right. Now that the basics are over" she said, "time for more… different… questions".

"Th-there's more?" I whined and Bruce grinned, patting me on the shoulder, "almost done don't worry". I sighed, frustrated, and he laughed slightly.

* * *

"Have you eaten in the past week?" Natasha asked.

"Yes" I replied and she hit me over the back of the head, "Lie".

"O-okay, no, I haven't e-eaten since Pepper l-left" I said.

"She left 13 days ago Stark" Nat said, "have you slept in the past week?".

"Yes" I replied and she hit me again, "this is what's gonna happen every time you lie Stark".

"Fine, no, I h-haven't slept in t-the past week" I grumbled.

"Have you had anything other than alcohol in the past week?".

"…..I've had-d coffee… d-does coffee count?" I asked hopefully and she shook her head.

"Then n-no".

"Are you mad that we didn't believe you about Loki?" she asked quietly. Why, oh, why did she have to go THERE? Of all places, she chose the whole 'Trust' box.

"Yes" I replied.

"Are you upset that we didn't believe you about it?".

"No" I replied and she hit me over the back of the head again.

"The truth Stark. Now, are you going to leave the lab anytime soon?"

"No" I said again and she sighed, dropping my hand.

"Fine, that's it for now. I'll be back later when your… less drunk".

"I'm n-not drunk" I grumbled, "I'm simply…intoxicated".

"Your drunk" Bruce replied, patting me on the shoulder again before he left with Natasha. A lie detector test… I wonder if they knew that I knew what they were doing… And Bruce was the muscle… Why would NATASHA of all people need protection? Either she thought I was going to try and kill her, unlikely, or she was actually worried about my welfare… Both were as likely as the next… But which one?

* * *

**Chapter 6 is over,**

**BAD NEWS!**

**I cant update for another 2 weeks cause I'm out of the country!**

**SO SAD!**

**But I'll make it up to ye, I have a new story idea for Clint and Natasha!**

**Rachel**


	7. Chapter 7

_**IM BACK!**_

_**AND I GOT LOADS OF NEW STORIES!**_

_**This is the second last chapter :(**_

_**Hopefully its good**_

* * *

**CHAPTER 7**

Natasha did come back later, without Bruce. She was on her own and while i was still drunk and still drinking, she didn't care. She just sat down on the work top where Loki had been all those weeks before and just watched me. She didn't laugh when I completely screwed up the coffee machines wiring, she didn't stop me when I got yet another bottle of scotch, and she didn't comment on the obvious fact that I looked like trash. She just sat there and watched me. Just watched.

* * *

"You want food?". I looked up at the sudden question. This was the first time Nat had spoken in about three hours. "No" I replied, going back to my work. "You need food" she said and I looked up again, "doesn't mean I have to have it". "Technically, it does. I'm getting food" she continued. "Then go get your food" I replied, confused by the random topic. She stood up and left, returning amazingly fast a few minutes later with a plate of toast. "You want some?" she asked again and I looked up at her, "what?" "Toast. I've got two slices. You want one?" She asked again. Why was she being so nice? "No" I said again and she shrugged, hoping up on the counter again as she bit into the toast. Strange.

"You want food?" "Again? Honestly? You're asking me again?" I asked looking up at her and she nodded, "you could have changed your mind". "Well I didn't. And i won't... Why are you being so Pepper-like all of a sudden?" I asked. "...Someone has to make sure you don't blow up the lab. And she'll be back in two days so you don't have to put up with me for long". "It's freaky. I'd prefer you were glaring and forcing me to eat than this" I replied and she sighed, "you sure you want me to go all Russians-spy on you?" "...ok yea. Guess not. Just don't... Be so caring and stuff. It's weird" I replied. "I don't make promises I can't keep Stark".

A loud knock made us both look up to the door. Rogers was standing there, looking very... Awkward. "He'll be looking for you" I said, turning back to my coffee machine. I was almost finished it. "It can wait" Natasha replied as Steve knocked again. "Seriously. Capcicle will keep knocking till kingdom come" I said and she sighed, hopping off the counter and walking over to the door, Jarvis sliding it open for her. "Cap?" She asked expectantly. "Fury's called a meeting. Terrorists related" he said in his official I'm-Captain-America voice. She turned back to me, as if asking my permission. Wow things were fucked up. "I'll be here" in said simply and she gave me an apologetic smile before following him out into the corridor, Jarvis sliding shut the door after them. And once again, I was alone. So very alone.

* * *

"Hello Stark". I didn't jump at his voice, I didn't flinch as he brushed past me, and I didn't argue when he sat in the same place Nat had been. "Hey Reindeer Games" I replied calmly and he frowned, "you'll do well not to call me that Stark". "Oh? And what would you like me to call you? Rock of Ages? Rudolf? Most wanted criminal on SHIELD's list?" I asked, not bothering to look up. "How about... My Liege? Or even just Loki is fine" he replied. "Nah, I think Rudolf's better". "Watch your mouth mortal" he hissed and I sighed, "You really got to control that temper of yours. Thor hasn't got one at all". That hit a nerve. "Don't. You. Dare. Bri-". "Bring your brother into this. I know, I know, you've said it a million times already" I said cutting him off, "you really got to get new lines you know. It's beginning to get boring listening to you speak". His hand inched towards his waist where I presumed a knife was hidden, but he stopped himself at the last minute. "Quiet" he agreed and I looked up at him sceptically, "that's all you can say? You're not going to try and kill me again?". "No" he replied smirking, "I'm here to make a deal".

"A deal? With me?" I asked, "how come I can't picture this working out?". "Oh it's quiet simple indeed Stark" he replied, smirking one of those I-know-something-you-don't grins. And it was creeping me out. Big time. "What kind of deal?". "I knew you'd be interested" he said happily, "the deal, , is quiet easy. I'll give you what you want in return for what I want". "Yea. That's a deal. I got that. But what do you want?" I asked. "You want freedom. Just freedom. From all of this. For me to disappear, for all of this to go away, for your name to be cleaned". I stared at him, "...it can't be that easy". "That's your part of the deal. Then there's my side" he replied, grinning evilly at me. "You want to take over the world again? Cause I can't help you there". "No Stark. What i want is much simpler than that. I want you DEAD".

* * *

"Doesn't that kind if defeat the point?" I asked, "I mean, I'd die before everyone thinks I'm innocent". "Perhaps you didn't hear me. I want you DEAD" he said again and I nodded, "ok. Yea. I see where you're coming from there. The whole daddy-issue thing, and the fact I didn't die when you were so sure I did, but it has nothing in it for me". "No. You don't understand. I want yo-". "Dead" I finished, "no. I got that. You want me dead. I want you dead. Both in collision here". He stared at me confused, "you're not scared that I'm going to kill you?". Sighing, I put down my tools, "we've already been through this Reindeer Games. I don't care if I die. Thanks to you, I have nothing to live for. So yes, I did hear you the first time, and I do understand... But it has no effect on me". "Then let's make this more interesting then. How about in disappear forever more, and when Nick Fury finally drops charges, I'll come back and kill you" he said and I weighed out the possibilities in my head. It might work... But the odds were pointing the other way... Not in my favour then... "Do we have a deal ?" Loki asked, walking over and holding out his hand. Feverishly, I reached out and took it, surprised by how cold his skin was. Grinning up at him, I shook the Gods hand, "Deal".

* * *

I had to run. I had to go. I had to leave. For good. Two hours later when Natasha returned, I was still staring at the blank wall in front of me, as I'd been doing since Loki left. I had to get away from here. "Stark". I had to disappear. "Stark?". I had to go somewhere else. "STARK". Oh right, real life. I forgot about that.

Turning to Natasha, who was currently outside the lab door she stared at me suspiciously, "I've been calling you for 20 minutes. So you better have a good explication for ignoring me" she said crossing her arms. "J? Is there any way you could get rid of her?" I asked quietly. "I'm afraid not sir, really is quiet persistent" Jarvis replied. "...you know any good excuses I could use?". "Sir, perhaps you should tell her about -". "DON'T say his name Jarv" I warned before sighing and rubbing my eyes tiredly, "let her in". "As you wish sir". A second later the door slid open and Natasha stormed in, "do you KNOW how much Pepper will kill me if I let you die?". I didn't reply, I just turned back to the blank wall ahead of me. "... What are you looking at?" Nat asked, walking over to me. I remained silent. "Seriously will you stop? Don't stare mysteriously off into the distance like that" she said. "I don't know what you're talking about" I replied. "Then what are you staring at?" "It's just... Just a bit of wall..." I said shrugging and she sighed, "Food. Now. Then bed. I am banning you from getting up anything earlier than 8am tomorrow morning. Go". I got up and left without any reluctance and I could feel her confused gaze follow me until I disappeared up the stairs. Normally it took FOREVER to leave the lab and even then I might not go. Usually it ended with Pepper literally grabbing me by the ear and dragging me up the stairs, yelling at me and threatening that she would get Jarvis to never let me in the lab again. So me going easily without an arguing word like this was strange. Very strange. And things were just about the get stranger.

* * *

**_Sorry bout the lenght but i had to write it really quickly_**

**_And thank you oncw again for all the views!_**

**_Much appreciated!_**

**_Rachel_**


	8. Chapter 8 (Final)

_**Last Chapter!**_

_**But dont worry, i have TWO sequeasl to it!**_

_**Book 2 of this series is called 'Live Like We're Dying'**_

_**And Book 3 is called 'Science And Fate'**_

_**Rachel**_

* * *

**C****hapter 8**

The Avengers were called out again the next day. And they were going to be gone for at least three hours. But I'd be gone by then. I counted down 10 seconds after i heard the door behind them before rushing upstairs into my room, grabbing a backpack and throwing everything I needed into it. Money, Clothes, food, and water. The basics.

I barely stopped moving, knowing that if I stopped to think, i would manage to convince myself out if it. Realise that leaving just like this would be suspicious and make Fury believe I was a bad guy even more. But that's what I needed. Loki said he'd never contact me again, until Fury dropped the charges, and that's when he would kill me. So I had to go. To disappear. It would make everyone believe I was with the crazed god, and I could avoid getting murdered for another while. Hopefully.

The only fault i could see in my plan was Pepper. She knew all my houses so i couldn't to any of them. And she would be completely deviated, heartbroken that i left without telling her. So I wrote a note, explaining everything but the part about Loki and I's deal. That part, nobody needed to know.

I could start again. I WOULD start again. In a place where nobody would even think if looking for me... Rio. I could go to Rio De Janeiro in Brazil. It's where Bruce was before SHIELD got in contact. It was a stupid, idiotic, moranic thing to do... And it was perfect.

* * *

I couldn't use my phone or credit cards, nor could I use my ID. So those we left behind. I couldn't do anything that would make me recognisable either. None of my cars. None of my trademark suits. Nothing. I had to change my appearance too. So as much as it killed me to do it, I shaved my beard, cut my hair up short and dyed it blond. I didn't know exactly why I had blond hair dye, but I was thankful for it. Staring at myself in the mirror, i let out a shaky breath. I looked so different, like an army man, a soldier. Cropped blond hair. Shaven face. Clothes that I'd never worn before. A backpack carrying all i had. And a hard edge to my eyes. I looked harsh, cold, like I'd seen too many things in my life, like I'd been through so much shit I'd just given up caring. That wasn't what scared me. What scared me, was the fact it true.

* * *

"Jarvis?" I asked a steely, determinate edge to my voice. "Yes sir?" The AI asked. "I'm going to be gone for a while. I don't know how long. I want you to look after the place" I said. "Yes sir". Thank god he knew when and when not to ask questions. "And lock he lab. Only grant access to Pepper, and don't let anyone, ANYONE, touch the suit or weapons" I added. "Of course sir. Is there anything else?". I thought for a moment, "...Delete all tape of me from when the Avengers left today, to when I've left. And don't tell anyone what I just said. No one. They're not to know a thing". "Yes sir". "...I'm going to miss you Jarv" I said sadly, opening up the door. "Me too sir, me too".

* * *

Then I was gone.

* * *

**_IM FINISHED!_**

**_BOOK 2 IS NOW BEING UPLOADED!_**

**_Rachel_**


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